Life is all about change. How we deal with it, use it, and cope with it. Recently my fiance and I went through the pre-marital counseling process and we did an assessment to, for lack of a better term, ‘evaluate’ ourselves and see where we line up and don’t. We were both very different when it came to how we handled change. I’ve been experiencing a lot of change and will continue to experience even more due to my upcoming wedding.
During my teens (gosh I feel old saying that!) I had to “mature” a little quicker than others perhaps when my family and I had to move from Colorado to Pennsylvania. Colorado was my home, it was my life, it was everything that I had ever known. There was no denying it, it was really happening and I could either make the process a whole lot worse by pitching a fit or accepting it and trying to embrace it for the best. Overall I feel I handled it quite well but there were rough moments. After finishing high school in Pennsylvania, I then found a university in Tennessee and moved once again, but this time without my family. I did not know one single person. I made the best of that situation as well. Now I have graduated, been graduated for about 2 years now, and am in the work force and it is a DRASTIC difference from college life (my Dad can attest to how much I ‘lived’ it up in college, haha). Those were the days. I’m riddled with bills, responsibility, money management, time management, etc. Looking back on this paragraph it is crazy to see how much change I have experienced since 2002. I really should be a much more bitter and resentful person but I’m not. I’m happy.
My point I’m getting at is we can either be pissed with how things are or we can embrace them and see what good has come out of the change. I grew closer to my family through the move, I became so much more self-confident by going to college in Tennessee, I found my soon-to-be wife, I’ve gained another family, have life long friendships, a job that helps at-risk youth and I’m financially stable. My change has enabled me to be successful, but only because I embraced it.
We have to embrace the change or else it’s going to be a terrible road ahead of us. Why would we want to make it harder for ourselves? I know there are those that have experienced much more drastic and difficult change then me and they would probably state, “Well, you haven’t been through what I’ve been through – I have a right to be upset.” Do you really? Do I? The harsh, but true, answer is no. If you are reading this then that automatically means you have the comfort of the internet, which outside the borders of America, becomes a luxury.
Let’s stop complaining and whining. Let’s look past our self. See the bigger picture. There is something much bigger happening here and without the change we’d 1) miss it, 2) never see the bigger picture and 3) never move past that ‘moment’ that forever scared us. I’ll simply leave you with this: A pastor was talking about change during a service I was attending at my church back in Colorado (before the move) and he stated that we are all trying to go from point ‘A’ to point ‘C’ but to get to point ‘C’ we had to go through ‘B’ first. If you don’t experience that change and if you don’t go through point ‘B’ then we’ll just miss it. That’s been over 8 years ago and I still remember it like it was yesterday.
Think back 2, 5, 10 years ago and look what you have gone through, who has helped you along the way and how much you have changed. Some will be nasty moments and some will be life altering. Without this change you would not be the person you are today sitting here reading these words. My soon-to-be Father-in-law (I love using hyphens!) told my fiance that you should always remember those that helped you get to where you are today. I say those are worthy words to live by.
_C.Gates
